Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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