is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
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