If i come over, it means nothing
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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