We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
