i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Come on in and take your pants off
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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