Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry leslieknope hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(414): View more from Wisconsin

dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down

(920): View more from Wisconsin

wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?

Fav 5 1064 1641
share tweet
(513): View more from Ohio

I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.

Fav 10 761 5064
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(918): View more from Oklahoma

Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it

Fav 29 4020 1850
share tweet
(337): View more from Louisiana

Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta

Fav 21 4818 1522
share tweet
(347): View more from New York

These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.

Fav 14 3852 1290
share tweet
(302): View more from Delaware

A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made

Fav 13 1988 924
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(516): View more from New York

Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box

Fav 9 907 1806
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(224): View more from Illinois

And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.

Fav 2 353 114
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(702): View more from Nevada

I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?

(1-702): View more from Nevada

Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.

Fav 0 80 10
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT