i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Randomize
