She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
