I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
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