just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
