So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
