Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Your cock deserves a montage
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize