so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
