You're a womanizer and a bitch.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize