just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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