So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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