How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
