i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
