you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Randomize
