Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
