what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
