its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
