I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
