I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
This is the high leading the old right now
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
