omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
He passed out mid-signature
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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