is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
