I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize