I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
