yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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