im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
