But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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