nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
