Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
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