WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
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