no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Randomize
