Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
