so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
