Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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