i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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