I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I see more hoeing in ur future
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