I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
