Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
