If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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