Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
