I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
