I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
