i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I have surprise drugs for everyone
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
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