is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
