i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
