I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize